03/29/2024
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Most of us want the best for our children. However, child abuse and neglect are all too common occurrences.

Abuse is the intentional maltreatment of a child. It can be physical, sexual, or emotional. Neglect, on the other hand, is failure to give a child the necessary care they need.

Oftentimes, abusive adults were victims of child abuse themselves. Having never experienced or learned acceptable forms of discipline, they instead end up teaching their children the same violent ways of dealing with anger.

Both types of maltreatment are often accompanied by deep emotional scars. Under no circumstances does any child ever deserve this.

Abuse from an adult can be intentional or could also be the effects of stressful situations. Even if the maltreatment of a child is a result of overflowing emotions, it can still have serious repercussions.

There are four distinguishable types of abuse:

  1. Physical Abuse – Injuring a child by hitting, kicking, shaking, or burning, etc. him/her; also includes throwing objects at the child.
  2. Emotional Maltreatment – Crushing a child’s spirit with degrading derogatory verbal attacks, threats, or humiliation.
  3. Sexual Abuse – Sexual contact with a child (incest, inappropriate touching, rape); pornographic use of a child.
  4. Neglect – Failure to provide for a child s physical or emotional needs (food, clothing, shelter, medical care, physical or emotional attention); failure to provide guidance or supervision, abandonment.

While it is important to note that any one of these could mean anything or nothing, there are signs that may signal the presence of child abuse or neglect. There are several reasons a child may be overly compliant when trying to please a teacher or not want to go home on a particular day. However, the presence of two or more of these should raise a red flag and give reason to, at least, talk to the child and/or parent or, at most, call your local Child Protective Services agency. Keep in mind, issues related solely to poverty are not considered child maltreatment issues.

Signs of abuse include:

The Child:

  • Shows sudden changes in behavior or school performance
  • Displays overt sexualized behavior or exhibits sexual knowledge that is inconsistent with their age
  • Has not received medical attention for a physical injury that has been brought to the parents’ attention
  • Has learning problems that cannot be attributed to specific physical or psychological causes
  • Is always watchful, as though preparing for something bad to happen
  • Is overly compliant, an overachiever or too responsible
  • Comes to school early, stays late and does not want to go home
  • Has unexplained burns, bites, bruises, broken bones or black eyes
  • Has bruises or marks in non-prominent, “fleshy” areas of the body (for example, inside of biceps or behind the knees)
  • Has fading bruises or other marks noticeable after an absence from school
  • Seems frightened of the parents and protests or cries when it is time to go home from school
  • Shrinks at the approach of adults
  • Reports injury by a parent or another adult caregiver

The Parent or Other Adult Caregiver:

  • Shows little concern for the child, rarely responding to the school’s requests for information, conferences or home visits
  • Denies the existence of or blames the child for problems in school or at home
  • Asks the classroom teacher to use harsh physical discipline if the child misbehaves
  • Sees the child as entirely bad, worthless or burdensome
  • Demands perfection, or a level of physical or academic performance the child cannot achieve
  • Offers conflicting, unconvincing or no explanation for the child’s injury
  • Describes the child as “evil” or in some other very negative way
  • Is abusing alcohol, prescription drugs or illegal drugs, and that abuse is having an adverse impact on the child
  • Uses harsh physical discipline with the child
  • Has a history of abuse as a child

Healthy brain development can be disrupted by Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs). This can potentially lead to lifelong negative health outcomes. Every child deserves to be nurtured and grow up in a safe, stable environment in which they can thrive.

The physical effects of child abuse and neglect are painful and can require medical attention. As far as the mental and emotional impacts, studies have shown that they are profound. Low self-esteem, insecurities, and trouble building relationships are just some of the effects that can develop as a result of maltreatment.

If you suspect that a child is being abused or neglected, or you think a child may have died from being mistreated, you must report what you know to the county Department of Social Services. This is the law. Do not be afraid to report. As long as you are acting in good faith, you cannot be held liable by law.

If you are a parent who needs help, please ask. It will not be seen as a sign of weakness, but instead, as a sign of strength.  Triple P’s – Positive Parenting Program is a free online program. Visit the NC Services and Information Catalog, or call the DHHS Customer Service Center (1-800-662-7030) for assistance finding programs and people to help you.

If there is an emergency, call 911. To report suspected child maltreatment, contact a county department of Social Services.

Or contact your:

  • Family physician or pediatrician
  • 1-800-4-A-CHILD (National Child Abuse Hotline)

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